Post by Kelly Jacobs on Mar 17, 2009 19:58:45 GMT -5
Wala lang. I just posted this kasi naloloka na ako. Walang scientific basis ito ha, just the opinion of one person.
For the past two weeks, I have been sober. Sober in the sense na I haven't touched a single stick of cigarette nor puffed one. I haven't been drinking in the past two weeks either, except on one occassion that I laced my iced tea with brandy. But it was hardly a shot, I just wanted to spice up my iced tea.
So anyway, I was so bummed up yesterday after witnessing a rather depressing event, so I went out for a walk. I found myself later in front of a store, lighting up a stick, shaking from anger, sadness, and later... euphoria. All I had in my pockets is P2.00, so I wasn't able to buy candy to accompany the smoke.
So there I was, breaking my sobriety, walking... walking... and stopping in front of the apartment I stayed my days in. Of course, it was 1 p.m., there was no one inside. So I went walking again.
High, I was like floating in the air, my steps bouncy. I removed my jacket and walked back to the crime scene. The momentary high gave my the euphoric sense that I needed at the time.
I watched a tv series on my laptop when I got back to the apartment. After about two hours of watching, which is not new, by the way: we've had marathons that lasted almost a whole day... I started feeling sick. I ran to the bathroom, dumping out what remained undigested of my choco rumble. More came out, and soon it tasted sour.
I came back to the room, feeling light-headed. On the way home, I was barely myself. At home, I almost wanted to collapse. My food was left untouched, fearing that I might throw them up later. Sayang naman, i thought. I wasn't able to finish my presentation for a class because I was so damn tired and the dizziness won't go.
Before I fell off to sleep, I remebered the times in January where I was smoking at least two sticks a day for a straight week. I experienced the same dizziness, throwing up, and exhaustion. Because of that condition, I had to visit a doctor and they he said that my blood pressure is low, and if I was taking my supplements. I wasn't, because they taste like cement. He advised me to continue drinking my meds and stop smoking.
No need to tell me that I was a bad listener.
And so here I am. Feeling a bit okay na. We're going to Boston Cafe later with my friends and I have got to be prepped up for it.
Suffice to say, if I wanted to be bulimic, I'd smoke na lang.
For the past two weeks, I have been sober. Sober in the sense na I haven't touched a single stick of cigarette nor puffed one. I haven't been drinking in the past two weeks either, except on one occassion that I laced my iced tea with brandy. But it was hardly a shot, I just wanted to spice up my iced tea.
So anyway, I was so bummed up yesterday after witnessing a rather depressing event, so I went out for a walk. I found myself later in front of a store, lighting up a stick, shaking from anger, sadness, and later... euphoria. All I had in my pockets is P2.00, so I wasn't able to buy candy to accompany the smoke.
So there I was, breaking my sobriety, walking... walking... and stopping in front of the apartment I stayed my days in. Of course, it was 1 p.m., there was no one inside. So I went walking again.
High, I was like floating in the air, my steps bouncy. I removed my jacket and walked back to the crime scene. The momentary high gave my the euphoric sense that I needed at the time.
I watched a tv series on my laptop when I got back to the apartment. After about two hours of watching, which is not new, by the way: we've had marathons that lasted almost a whole day... I started feeling sick. I ran to the bathroom, dumping out what remained undigested of my choco rumble. More came out, and soon it tasted sour.
I came back to the room, feeling light-headed. On the way home, I was barely myself. At home, I almost wanted to collapse. My food was left untouched, fearing that I might throw them up later. Sayang naman, i thought. I wasn't able to finish my presentation for a class because I was so damn tired and the dizziness won't go.
Before I fell off to sleep, I remebered the times in January where I was smoking at least two sticks a day for a straight week. I experienced the same dizziness, throwing up, and exhaustion. Because of that condition, I had to visit a doctor and they he said that my blood pressure is low, and if I was taking my supplements. I wasn't, because they taste like cement. He advised me to continue drinking my meds and stop smoking.
No need to tell me that I was a bad listener.
And so here I am. Feeling a bit okay na. We're going to Boston Cafe later with my friends and I have got to be prepped up for it.
Suffice to say, if I wanted to be bulimic, I'd smoke na lang.